I’m a man and my uncle abused me as an adolescent boy, twice by the same man (my uncle). The first time when I was five, I was in my room grounded for playing in the paint that was being used to paint the outside of our house. Well, there were three suits on my bed that was to be worn by my uncle, my grandpa and another member of the gospel band. I heard someone come upstairs so I went to see who it was, it was my uncle going to the bathroom. I stood at my bedroom door, as my uncle finished he turned to leave and saw me at my door and called me to him.
I went to him wanting someone to help me get out of my room so I could go and play outside which didn’t happen, he asked me if I had ever seen a mans penis before, I told him “No, what is that?”. He unfastened his pants and pulled them down and showed me his penis, he asked me if I had ever touched a penis before, I told him I had not so he grabbed my hand and put it on his penis, then he asked me if “I had ever put a penis in my mouth before” I said “No”. He then replied, “Here let me put mine in your mouth, it will make me feel good”. He then guided my head to his penis. My uncle abused me and threatened me not to tell anyone.
I didn’t know what he was doing to me
I didn’t feel comfortable or know what to do as it touched my mouth, I reluctantly opened my mouth, he then started to pump himself in and out of my mouth, until I felt this nasty tasting stuff fill my mouth. I quickly backed away and spat that nasty stuff out, he then told me not to say anything to anybody, not even my parents or they would get mad at me. I believed him and told no one. I had pushed it out of my mind and forgot about that day until a few years later.
I was ten years old and my parents were going through a divorce so we had to stay with my aunt and uncle (my mom’s brother). One Saturday morning I woke up around 7:00 am and the tv was on, cartoons were playing so I sat up in bed and watched them. Soon after my uncle woke up, looked around at everyone sleeping and asked me to sit in the recliner chair with him and get under the blanket he had over him so I didn’t get cold. A few minutes later he put his hands inside my pajama bottoms and started playing and stroking my penis, it got hard but I felt really uneasy, he told me to do to him what he was doing to me, my uncle abused me again, with my family sleeping close by.
I didn’t know what to do so I slowly touched his, but I never moved my hand like he was doing to me, I got really scared and didn’t know how to stop what was going on so I told him I had to pee and I quickly got up and went to the bathroom and closed the door behind me, the door had a broken lock so I couldn’t lock the door. I pulled out my penis and tried to pee but I couldn’t so I just stood there.
My uncle abused me in the bathroom
My uncle followed me a few moments later and he came in the bathroom, he got on his knees and put my penis in his mouth and sucked me for several minutes. I just wished he’d go away and leave me alone. He kept on sucking until I had this weird but unusual good feeling and then it was a tickling feeling, so I pushed his head off me, he asked me if it felt good, I was scared and nervous so I said yes.
Then he looked me straight in my eyes and said if I told anyone that he would hurt me, so I had better be a good boy and not tell anyone. I got even more scared than before. Later that night my dad had stopped over to visit me and my two sisters and have a talk with my mom and I was glad to see my dad. I walked into the kitchen where everyone was and told my parents that I needed to talk to them about my uncle.
My parents listened as I told them about what my uncle had done to me earlier that day. My dad told all of us to pack our stuff together and he’d take us to the motel and that he’d pay for it as long as we needed, he’d pay as long as we were “Not in that house with that worthless piece of shit”.
My uncle pleaded guilty to abusing me
The next day my parents took me to the police station where I retold them my uncle abused me and what had happened the morning before. Months later at the court hearing, he pleaded guilty and went to jail for a short period of time. At the court proceedings, I found out that he had molested both of my sisters as well. It took me years to get over this and I still feel uncomfortable around some men in certain situations.
I am a religious man and the good book says we have to forgive in order to be forgiven of the father, it took a while but I talked with my uncle and let him knew how I felt and how uncomfortable he had made me feel for many years, that I didn’t know why he did what he did but that God said we had to forgive one another, so I forgave him with true forgiveness but that it will be hard to forget that my uncle abused me.
I’m 45 now with 4 children of my own and I was very protective of them, to keep them from experiencing what I went through, I did what any father would do to protect them. I also have 8 grandchildren and hope and pray no one ever touches them but if someone ever did I would do what ever and I mean what ever it takes to get them away from that situation and do my best to protect them.
I’m sorry it was a long story but it feels good to get it off my chest. I know now that it will be a lifelong healing process for me and I hope not too many people have too or have ever gone through similar experiences and if you have, I can say from my own experience, lean and trust in GOD to help you through your healing process, he is a good listener.
May GOD BLESS you all. Thank you for listening
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