This is an anonymous blog post
I’ve always wanted to share my story, if only to see if somebody out there in the world can give me some feedback. I am 31, married for a year, with no children.
I’ve been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, ADHD, panic disorder, and depression.
I came off Paxil last September because I felt like it wasn’t working for me anymore.
My anxiety was returning and I felt it had kind of “pooped out.”
Fast forward to today, I’ve been on about seven different antidepressants, none of them with any success.
Throughout this journey I been using Klonopin as a crutch; I honestly don’t know what I would’ve done without it. (I’m on a small dose-anywhere from 0.5 to 1.5 mg per day as needed.
My medicine management guy recently decided since all of these antidepressants aren’t working, he wanted to go down another path.
He put me on Lamictal and Quetiapine.
The Lamictal is normally prescribed for bipolar, but has also been known to occasionally be prescribed for anxiety. The Quetiapine is I’m guessing, for sleep as I was not sleeping well on my 150 mg of Zoloft. (Forgot to add I’m still on the Zoloft!)
Also, I had a myomectomy in February to remove three tumors from my uterus; I now have a c-section scar.
The doctor said with the tumours in, I only had a 5% chance of having a baby with them in there and would have complications.
Myomectomy and pregnancy fears
[themify_quote]Myomectomy (my-o-MEK-tuh-mee) is a surgical procedure to remove uterine fibroids — also called leiomyomas (lie-o-my-O-muhs). These are common noncancerous growths that appear in the uterus, usually during childbearing years, but they can occur at any age.[/themify_quote]
My husband decided there was no question; I had to have to surgery.
Anyway, I ended up getting temporary nerve damage from the surgery, leaving me in debilitating pain in my legs and back. It has recently started to subside though.
So now the doctors say I have a 70-80% chance of having a baby.
I cannot tell you how anxious it makes me to think about having a baby and trying to go off my meds.
I’m so afraid.
I get dizzy, foggy, and really just inexplicable feelings when I try a new medication and wait for the other to kick in. I also get terrible anxiety about fertility problems.
The tumours have a 33% chance of coming back in a year, so I have to try for a baby from now until next February!
I don’t feel mentally prepared, I’m scared if I don’t try then the tumors will return, and I’m tearing up just thinking about it.
This is all on top of my husband trying to find a job so we can move back to our hometown and hour away. As soon as he gets a job we will put our house up, but he hasn’t even gotten an interview, so that makes me worry too…because all I really want is to be home.
So anyways, I know I’m longwinded but my myomectomy and pregnancy fears are ruining my life.
My question is, can anybody out there offer some advice on any of this?
Have you had a myomectomy and then successfully gotten pregnant?
Have you been pregnant and gone off your meds?
My only thing is that while Yoga, meditation, diet change has helped others with their mental health, it has not helped me.
I rely on medicine. It saved my life once before (when I went on Paxil) so I believe going off it could be detrimental.
My specific question does not have to do with holistic practices; I just have to put that out there because I’ve been given that advice already. (Not to sound rude or off putting!!)
Thanks so much for taking he time to read this. Hopefully there’s someone out there like me who can help.
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