It is so hard to know that my dad doesn’t want me in his life, does he not love me? Was I that bad as a child that he hated me? I knew I wasn’t wanted by him, he made that very clear. I was twelve years old the day my dad left my mother. As a young girl I closed my eyes most nights and would see him walking out the door with his bags and I remember the promise he made to me.
I knew that my parents were not happy, my mother spent days in bed, crying, she was severely depressed and my dad spent most of his free time downstairs on the computer, although he did the housework and fed me and my siblings.
My mom had five children, but only four lived at home, the eldest lived with his real dad. My older two siblings were not my dad’s but he looked after them as if they were his own. My dad only had me and my younger sister and still has no other biological children that I know of.
I remember always being daddy’s girl, he’d be there to teach us to ride our bikes and take us to school. I think my youngest memory was when I was in nursery and we had a teddy bears picnic, parents were invited and everyone had to take a teddy bear with them. My dad dressed me up as a teddy bear so while I took my own bear, my dad took me as his.
The older I got the more I noticed the wedge between my mum and dad and eventually he left. I remember the day he left very clearly. I had got up that morning and my dad sat me down and explained he wasn’t happy anymore and needed to move out. I helped him pack his stuff into boxes that he had got from the shop across the road, and then helped him load his car.
I even went with him to look at a room where he was moving too. It was in a 3 story house and his room was to be in the loft. I cuddled him and sobbed, I wanted to be with him and I asked him “please let me come with you”. He told me soon as he got a proper flat I could go live with him but there was no space in this lodging room.
My Dad Doesn’t Want Me In His Life And That Hurts
My mom took the breakup badly and I ended up caring for my mom and raising my siblings, but that’s another story. My dad would have me one night a week, I had to go work with him delivering pizzas tho as that was the only free time he had.
He eventually moved into a 2 bedroom flat and for some reason, he never came to get me and in time I learned that I wasn’t ever going to live with my dad as he had promised and I grew to resent him.
Why did my dad not want me?
Knowing my dad doesn’t want me in his life ruined my childhood and teenage years. I felt so unwanted and rejected.
It wasn’t until I eventually moved out and lived on my own that I found out that my dad had come back for me, for more once but my mom told him that I wasn’t allowed to go with him.
But because my dad had never told me this I thought he didn’t want me and that he just never come back for me and had broken his promise. He never told me as a child as he didn’t want to turn me against my mother.
I am sad to say that my attitude towards him changed and I was horrible. I was a nightmare child, there are no other words to describe my destructive behavior. I went off the rails all because I thought my dad didn’t want me but he did.
We now get on really well and my mom and I have a bad relationship, but it’s down to her the way things turned out.
The only regret I have is being a complete bitch but it wasn’t my fault I thought he didn’t love me.
My mom had turned me against him and I beg all you mothers out there to stop and think about your child before you use them as a weapon, as I promise you it will come back and bite you on the ass.
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