I want to share my experience of giving birth at 25 weeks and show off my amazing and brave little girl Meadow. I am a member of Emma’s Facebook group and I do not know where I would be now without their support throughout it all.
Meadow was born 25 weeks into my pregnancy
I was sent home from the hospital after spending a few nights in there as I was having contractions, they sent me home on a Tuesday evening even tho I told them that the contractions were getting worse, they didn’t believe me.
They said the would book an emergency scan for me in 2 weeks times, returned home and fell asleep on the sofa with my little girl. I woke up around 11:30 pm, feeling wet, I thought my girl had peed on me.
I stood up and I was covered in blood
I rushed to the hospital where I was 3cm dilated and I ended up giving birth to Meadow at 4:50 am that Wednesday morning, this little dolly was 1lb 7oz.
I was in shock just hearing this sweet beautiful cry. I have never heard anything like it before, so calming.
I couldn’t even cry, I felt just felt numb
I couldn’t move, they took my baby to one side, alarms were going off, doctors running in the room, they took my baby.
I was 25 weeks and 3 days when she had been born, so early. I didn’t know anything about premature babies, I didn’t know what to expect
After a few hours, I was finally allowed to go to SCBU to see my baby, she was all tubed and wired up. I didn’t know what was what and what was going on.
There were monitors beeping, my body in shock, it didn’t seem real.
Why is my baby in an incubator?
What’s all these tubes and wires?
The monitors started beeping louder, then alarms were going off.
My baby’s heart was slowing down, the nurse had to shout at the other nurse who was meant to be watching Meadow, she rushed over, I couldn’t move
They asked us to leave, I couldn’t even move, tears rolling down my face.
My babies going to die is all I could think
I couldn’t even bring myself to say the word finally her heart picked up the ventilator wasn’t in properly I wanted her christened meadow precious
Meadow was born with all her fingers and thumbs she was so tiny her skin looked so sore u could see all her veins I was afraid to touch her
We were rushed to another hospital, an hour drives away as the hospital I had her at didn’t have the equipment or experience for babies born under 30 weeks, it was the longest drive in the ambulance iv ever experienced.
We finally arrived and they took my baby again. They took me to the ward I was staying on and told me I would have to wait an hour so they could settle Meadow in.
It seemed like forever but I finally got to see her again
This time, she had blue lights over her, “what’s going on I’m confused?” I didn’t know anything, she was jaundice, I looked at her tiny body while she was laying under the light, her skin was so thin it looked like if you touched her she would crack, I was so scared.
They put me on a ward with different mothers who had their babies with them. I closed my curtains and cried all night. I heard babies crying, waking up to realise my baby wasn’t with me.
I was in a strange place and hour away from home, I just wanted to curl up in a ball and scream but I couldn’t. I felt like I had no one, I was on my own, I didn’t feel me at all, it didn’t seem real.
I felt like I had no one, I was on my own, I didn’t feel me at all, it didn’t seem real.
I was scared to hurt her
The first time I ever got to change my miracle baby’s nappy I was so scared, I thought I was going to break her, she was so tiny. I have never seen anything like it in my life, such a small beautiful but perfect baby
I didn’t even get to hold my baby when she was born, but on day 6 the nurse came around and asked if I wanted to hold my baby.
My hands started to shake, my heart started to beat faster, I was so excited but scared at the same time.
Meadow was finally placed in my arms, she was so tiny.
I never thought I would be sitting there holding anything so small, it was amazing, it was one of the proudest days of my life, finally getting to cuddle my precious miracle.
It was only for 10 minutes, but it was worth every second, just holding her, my love growing stronger, she was a miracle.
From then on I told myself never take anything for granted, to treasure every waking moment and to make the best out of every situation.
Meadow was only a couple of days old when I notice her hand turning purple, I asked the doctor what happened, they told me they had tried putting a line in her artery but couldn’t, they told me it would be fine, that it would go back to normal.
As days went by it was getting worse, even weeks later it was still purple, they kept reassuring me that shoe wouldn’t lose her fingers, that they would eventually go back to normal.
Finally, they admitted she was going to lose her fingers and thumb on her left hand. I cried every night.
Why did they lie to me?
Why couldn’t they do something to save them?
Why did they leave it too late?
I had so many questions that went unanswered
My poor beautiful princess had to lose her fingers and thumb it’s not fair.
The best ever cuddle was skin to skin contact, from then on we had a bond nobody could ever break.
My heart just felt all warm, the love I have for this small little baby is out of this world.
She is so perfect in ever single way, she is a true fighter.
Meadow is amazing, she did a lovely present in her nappy which went down my top, I could still smell it for ages after I was in the car on the way home.
I am a mother on Emma’s Facebook group and I want to share my experience of giving birth at
I’m so proud of my Meadow, she’s had a really bumpy road from day one, with so many problems and I nearly lost her New Year’s Day 2015 when she had to be resuscitated, it took 11 minutes to bring her back
The call I got asking me to get up the hospital as quickly as I could as Meadow was really poorly was horrific. I rung my mum and partner who couldn’t understand me. I was in bits.
I had been at home when the phone range and I had an hours drive to get to the hospital which felt like forever away. We finally got there to be told how she had to be resuscitated, I just wanted to die.
I nearly lost my baby girl, she is a miracle baby born at 25 weeks.
She is doing incredible these days.
I only had a few people in person supporting me through all of this, most of my family had the hump cause they weren’t allowed to see Meadow due to the hospital rules, so they got funny with me and didn’t care what I was going through.
I didn’t really have anyone to talk too, I only had a few family members but I can honestly say I had loads of people on Emma’s support group for mums and I don’t know where I would be without them.
* All pictures are copyrighted and belong to Meadow’s mum