Firstly let me make it very clear that I am not proud of the fact that I cried rape and before you judge me hear me out.
Read my story and see why I felt I had no other option.
My problems began once I eventually got out of a nasty abusive relationship.
Most people say that things got better once they got out, well I can honestly say that for a long time, things got worse rather than better.
My ex had decided that he would indeed follow up on his threat to ruin my life and immediately tried to get me to sign custody of my son over to him, something I point blank refused to do obviously.
He then decided a new way to try to get me to give him our son would be to have my home threatened.
His logic? ”If she doesn’t have a home for him, then the authorities will sign him to me”.
So I ran away
I went to a women’s refuge, and he remained on bail.
Twelve months later, I was living in a new home, 100 miles away from my old one, and he found me through the courts after attempting to take me to court for custody of our son.
The court refused to give him custody, instead leaving us with shared residency as he is on his birth certificate.
My address was included in the final court order as the place for him to come and collect his son for unsupervised access visits.
After the 4th contact, he refused to bring my son home.
I was heartbroken and had to then drag him through the courts.
I then decided enough was enough.
I reported him for rape and abuse that he had subjected me to while in a relationship.
He was arrested and bailed and my son was returned home to me.
We fled again to another women’s refuge, and the courts were informed.
He once again took me to court for custody of our son, he was denied it again, and just as we were leaving the courtroom, he pulled his final straw.
He turned around and shouted at the judge “but that bitch is sexually abusing him, I’ve seen it! How can you let that carry-on?!”
The tables turned, my son was placed with him while I was investigated.
I was cleared of any wrongdoing within days, but it was too late, he had vanished with my son.
He continued to taunt me and then once he finally reappeared, the court wouldn’t bring my son home.
He had managed to get my son into school, after school clubs and church groups, the court was satisfied that even though he had done wrong by vanishing with him, my son was happy, safe and settled and ”to uproot this child once more would be detrimental to his well-being”.
His father was still on bail.
He began hanging around my new home, watching me, following my new partner around.
I informed the police and they did nothing.
I THEN TOOK MATTERS INTO MY OWN HANDS, AND TO THIS DAY I STILL WOULD DO IT AGAIN.
I cried rape and was sent to prison for it
I made a Facebook account in the name of my ex and sent a message from that false account to my own account, threatening myself.
I then wrote a series of messages from his account to my own, admitting to raping me. I then gave this to police.
I then gave this to the police.
After seizing my computer, the police proved I had lied and I was arrested and charged with perverting the course of human justice.
I was sentenced to FOUR months in prison.
I was sent away to HMP Eastwood Park, in Glouster. My daughter was 5 months old and I had not even said goodbye to her that morning as she had been asleep.
My daughter was 5 months old and I had not even said goodbye to her that morning as she had been asleep.
My last words to my partner were “I’ll be home soon babes, Love you”
Three days after being locked up, I discovered completely by accident that I could possibly have my daughter with me, as I was only in for a short stay.
I asked immediately and my application was rushed through, two days later after interviews, phone calls with my social worker, the prison board accepted my application and my daughter joined me the following morning.
Three weeks into my stay I was informed by my social worker and my solicitor that my ex had been re-arrested and charged with rape and he would face court in a weeks time.
He had apparently bragged to a friend that he had gotten away with rape, that friend (thankfully) spoke to the police, and my ex pleaded guilty in court – he was sentenced to 2 years SUSPENDED sentence.
I was heartbroken.
After everything, he was still allowed to walk free.
Yes I had cried rape but I was desperate
My solicitor launched my appeal for release and succeeded.
I was released after only 7 weeks of a 17-week sentence.
I stood before the judge and told him that I was willing to do anything to protect my family and because the police had done nothing, I felt I had no choice in the end.
I clearly said I would do it all again if the authorities failed to protect us.
The judge accepted what I said, agreed that the police failed in their duty of care and pardoned my charges, they were wiped and I walked out of court a free woman.
I still have many problems with my ex and we broke up 5 and a half years ago.
He is still determined to ruin my life, and I have days when I know he has succeeded and I have days where I scream”F*CK YOU” at his emails on my computer screen.
BUT I broke the law, I cried rape and I accept that, but I really would do it all again if I felt my family were in danger and no one was protecting them.
Prison life is awful and I hated every minute of it, I had my child with me, which I know is very lucky.
I know most of you will judge me terribly and call me a bad mother for having my child in prison with me but it allowed me to keep my bond with her, helped me cope with prison life and allowed me to continue to breastfeed her as well.
Judge me all you want.
Yes, I cried rape but I did what I did out of a natural instinct to protect those I love, and to keep the precious bond with my child.
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