” I need to know how to make my wife happy again,” one gentleman asks. I have nothing more to go on than a brief question.
I receive so many emails each day that it’s difficult to respond to all, my dream would be to have a whole team of professional counselors working alongside me so I am able to respond to each and every email received.
Some emails I am able to use here on the blog via the blog anonymously section as the poster has written an in-depth question or have shared in great detail what they need help with, others send me a sentence.
I find it so difficult to hit the delete button when I have not replied, yet I just don’t have the time, nor do I have the vital skills needed, I am just me.
So what I do is send a complete list of resource sites and phone numbers to each and everyone who emails me via the blog asking for help. I never feel this is enough but it has contact details of well-known helplines, someone at the end of a phone who is trained and willing to help anyone who needs them.
Can I do more?
Teach Me How To Make My Wife Happy Again?
“How can I make my wife happy again,” asks one lost and confused gentleman this morning via my email, he doesn’t give me any insiders knowledge into why he feels his wife doesn’t feel happy, yet I feel the desperation in his words.
Or maybe it’s because it touches a raw nerve.
I left my own husband after 8 years together only 8 months ago, because I was unhappy in the marriage. He hadn’t done anything wrong, well he did everything wrong in the end, but it wasn’t intentional on his part, he could do no right towards the end.
I know how it feels to want to make the person you love happy when you would move mountain and earth for them. To have the person you love feel the same way about you, but there are many reasons why relationships go wrong and yes, they can be fixed.
My own husband still struggles with the decision I made, still doesn’t understand why I was so unhappy and I hold my hands up, had I have told him, I know he would have done anything he could to salvage our marriage, but I left it to late.
To be unhappy in a relationship drains you emotionally and physically, I know I had more bad days than good and the pretense that everything was fine wore me down until I could take no more. I was so unhappy and saw no other way. I made the right choice, I am happier now I am single.
So why has this man’s wife become unhappy?
Has she stopped loving him?
Is the marriage over?
Have they just lost their way?
Have they stopped communicating?
Perhaps she’s not happy with herself and if so there lies the problem, you can’t make someone happy, they have to find their own happiness.
If you’re not happy on the inside then you’re not happy about anything on the outside either.
You can buy her as many flowers and chocolates as you like, you can wine and dine her and buy her a new shiny piece of jewelry but no amount of money can buy happiness.
The fact that he’s asking “how to make my wife happy again” means he is lost and confused and has no idea what he’s done wrong.
Perhaps he has done nothing wrong.
Because the word again is there, which suggests she’s been happy before, so something has changed, the question is what has changed?
There are so many reasons someone becomes unhappy
I don’t know how long this couple has been together, perhaps many years and the children have grown up and flown the nest and now they feel lost or they are spending too much time with each other now they are retired or no longer have social hobbies away from each other?
Maybe it’s what they call the 7-year itch, where they have both become so used to each other that they have stopped trying, stopped making an effort, taken each other for granted.
Perhaps there has been a job loss, a new baby, a financial hurdle or even an affair?
There are so many reasons why a woman can become unhappy in her marriage. I became unhappy in my marriage because I changed, I grew and I wanted to reach goals I had never dreamed possible before.
I felt like a caged bird, my wings bound with tape. We wanted different things out of life, I had life goals, he was happy doing the same meaningless thing day in day out. I was bored with that life.
What I have learned is it takes two to tango, both of you have to want to make the marriage work.
How to make her happy again? Find out why she’s unhappy in the first place and promise you will do everything in your power to support her and help her become happy again and mean it.
What advise would you give to a man who said: “Tell me how to make my wife happy again”?